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Returning to Grace
Volunteers leave home to go back where they belong
By James A. Mitchell, VeAhavta Press Officer

For VeAhavta founder and President Eric Parkinson, his most recent visit to Trincomalee, Sri Lanka was not much different than his first. Eric traveled – then and now – with supplies, donations and, “Life saving equipment,” he said, a statement true in more ways than one.

“The first time I went to Sri Lanka, I traveled alone and I carried three suitcases filled with medication donated by Merck Pharmaceuticals,” Eric said. That was in 2001, before the cease-fire accord offered the false promise of peace, three years before the Dec. 26, 2004 tsunami made an impossible situation even more difficult.

This time, Eric left the comfort of southern California armed with over-packed bags of cards, letters and photos for the children and elders, 100 backpacks donated by Ernie Roide of Promotion Plus (see the News page on the VeAhavta web site for more information), donated sweaters and what he called “life saving equipment,” some ring buoys, a rescue can and whistles suggested by VeAhavta volunteer Tom McLaughlin, a physical therapist, longtime water sports enthusiast and former lifeguard. During an August visit to Grace Home, Tom saw the children struggle against waves, a sight that inspired the practical gift.

That wasn’t all Eric traveled with. Before leaving California, Eric accepted a generous donation of $2,460 from the Islamic Society of San Luis Obispo. Eric was invited to speak at the local mosque on Sept. 8, arranged by VeAhavta Chief Medical Officer Dr. Rushdi Abdul-Cader. A week later, the mosque welcomed back their “Brother,” and presented him with funds for Internally Displaced Persons relief in Trincomalee, facing a humanitarian after the August conflict that surrounded the area.

“This is remarkable,” Eric said. “Not just because they called me a ‘Brother,’ but also because the check was made out to VeAhavta, an organization with a Hebrew name. This shatters the stereotypes about Muslims: They are not terrorists. They care deeply about others, even about people they don’t know located halfway around the world.”
That’s the spirit of Grace Care Center. Eric left the comforts of home for his latest visit to the orphanage, but in many ways felt that he was going home. His first trip to Sri Lanka made him feel like, “A benevolent humanitarian coming to the aid of some poor, backward people,” he said. “The relationship was unbalanced before it started: I felt I had everything to give, but nothing to receive. What could the people of Sri Lanka offer me?”

Plenty, as he and many others have learned. In February 2005, Eric told the first group of post-tsunami visitors, “Everyone comes here looking for the same thing; they just don’t know what it is until they see it.” Things change in Sri Lanka – the 10 months between Eric’s previous visit and his September travels saw a country slide back toward war, and the needs of the people remain as great – if not greater – than ever.

But the special attraction of Grace Home remained stubbornly the same.
“Hope is still alive,” Eric said. “I have heard that hope in the voices of Rev. Jeyanesan and Diane McLaughlin, and the children. Giving into despair is not an option. To give up would be to abandon our brothers and sisters – something we cannot do.”

Volunteers who have made return visits understand the lure, the “state of Grace” as so many have called it. Going back was something they were driven to from the moment they left after their initial trip.

“Returning to Grace was what I promised myself I would do at the end of my first trip,” said Tom, whose August visit was to a country closer to war than peace. “I was a sobbing mess upon departure (it was what some of the Grace girls remembered most about me!), and when the opportunity to go back came up, all my energy went into it. Returning homes makes you feel like you are a member of a very special club.”
When Tom left for a second time (hiding the tears a little better than at the end of the first visit), there was less sorrow, he said. “Just joy and hope for the future of the special people there.”

Ann Arbor Dr. Cheryl Huckins has made three trips to Grace Care Center and the Mercy Home she helped establish. Cheryl understands the unique atmosphere of Grace: “It was like returning to summer camp,” she said. “An odd comparison, given the circumstance, but it is akin to returning someplace very special, that has many memories and intense relationships developed in a short period of time.”

Cheryl discovered that Grace, conceived as an orphanage for a few dozen children, has instead become nothing less than a community unto itself. She has traveled with large groups (her first trip’s companions numbered more than a dozen confused travelers) and small combinations of volunteers (her second visit was with just Doug Edema of St. Joseph Mercy Hospital). Further, the situations were different: Cheryl was introduced to Grace Home within weeks of the devastating tsunami; her second came at a time when staffing issues challenged both Grace and Mercy homes; and her most recent placed her in the geographic center of a battlefield.

“Although the world outside was going crazy, and impacted what we could and couldn’t do, on campus I felt like things were more “real,” that there weren’t layers of politics and agendas that were unspoken and that I couldn’t understand. It felt more like returning to a second home – pick up where you left off, do what you can, and hopefully leave it a little better off. And, enjoy the journey.”

The spirit of going back is the precise motivation that allowed Grace to succeed in the first place. Long before Eric graciously named me VeAhavta’s press officer (and Naresh Gunaratnam indelibly dubbed me “Grasshopper”) and allowed me to share, in some small way, the vision and mission of the incredible people of both Grace and VeAhavta, I assumed my first trip in February 2005 would remain my memory of the place.

It wasn’t until after I returned home (at least, to this home in America) that I thought, ‘Why not?’ That is the seed from which Grace grows. In the deceptively simple words of John Lennon: “There’s nothing you can do that can’t be done.” I knew I should return, and when I allowed the thought that I could, it wasn’t long before I found myself on the now-familiar winding road heading to Trinco, ignoring the exhaustion of travel as I came closer to the state of Grace. Inside the gates, I felt that, if I had a boyhood dog, it would have come running out of the children’s garden to greet me. (Instead, I stepped out of the van and was pummeled first by Hiram Labrooy and then Peter, whose bear hug seemed certain to crack a rib or two.)
I’ve read the words of reporters who made what used to be called “whistle-stops” to chronicle the surface stories of disaster or war (the difference being difficult to determine), and now understand what their prose is missing: An understanding of the beauty of the people there. That cannot be understood in a few days or even weeks. As the many volunteers have learned, short-term relief is one thing, but long-term relationships build hope for the future. That’s the story of Grace Care Center, and what keeps bringing ‘em back for more.

Grace Review | Meet Tharshala | Returning to Grace | Volunteer Profile